[2006-02-12]_11:34 p.m.
overspill
I have come to the conclusion
that I may suffer from an ailment
one that opens the doors of doubt
and closes the windows to possibility
and it also seems
that I may seek out refuge
from a cup or bottle
refuge from the internal
refuge from myself
and with this ailment
I will never be able to accept
or understand
what it is to be free
of doubt
of eagerness
of possibility
and when I jump head first into
the darkness
I don't stop any longer
to weight the
good
bad
or ugly
I dive into an imaginary standard
I've set for myself
and others
and my head
my heart
my soul
cannot continue
in this fashion.
I cannot hold back the resevoir
any longer
I can't hold back
that which has been overflowing
for some time now
I won't fool myself
any longer